June 16, 2010

When I don't feel like going to work

It surprises me how often you get to hear things like - 'the day I dont feel like getting up from bed and going to work, I will know I should quit'. Most recently from an interview of the god of cricket, and earlier from a lot of CEOs and successful old people. The most interesting thing is that by that standards, I should have quit right when I was 8 year old - or earlier - I dont remember.

The single biggest problem with my life has been to find to stick to something. Well, its hard. I tried often to follow english premier league and spanish and others. The most difficult part was that although I enjoyed watching the football - I could never commit myself to a team in particular. I tried Man U at school - tried Arsenal - never worked. In fact the only sporting team I could ever commit to was Indian cricket team. And there too, I remember the worldcup finals of 2003 when I almost started cheering for Ponting because of the magical way in which he was batting.

So, it is the same problem with work and other things. In a significantly long period of time in my life, when I was quite into Kurt Vonnegut and some deep thinking, I had concluded that there was no meaning to anything in life because sooner or later it all means nothing anyway. In a small way, it happens so often that I feel so intensely about something which I recall later to be about nothing. Some people like to say that time softens the edges, I think time only helps you put things in perspective. Older you get - more perspective you get on all the silly things you were so desperate about.

So anyway, my problems have changed ever since I decided that attitude was not going to help me get through with life (although it might indeed have been true). Now, I know that things that I worry about dont really matter - i worry about them nonetheless. Often, it is not so much of a choice either. But, if I was right in the first place - and things dont really matter - I can definitely say that it was one knowledge I couldn't find how to make use of.

So anyway, there is also a profession dependent aspect to it, I guess. When, people say things like they have a reason in life to wake up from bed. Now what do I wake up from bed for - nothing really. Most of the seemingly important things I do in life are in the night. But anyways, thats just play of words and not really what the great people meant. They only meant that there is something that keeps them going.

Well, like I famously once said - life keeps pushing and I keep moving. The inertia has only been going up, and life finds it harder to move me from bed, couch, chair or anywhere I am sitting once I sit there. But ya, in summary it is hard to find a motive that one can be motivated enough about for the life. A lot of people do welfare work, I dont think I am going to fare very well in that even though I'd love to. Sorry, for stupid (but intentional) play of words again.

Learning hot to play tennis seems to be the new in-thing. Finding equally enthusiastic partners who have the time when I have it is hard. Lets see where that goes. Also a question about going around Europe. Last night I  found a way to cheaply travel across Europe. The key is to go on Ryan airway website and look for tickets from places to places - if u have the time. For instance, once u are in madrid, ticket to paris will cost upwards of 30 euros. However, u can go to Porto and then go to Paris for much cheaper - and see more places. But then I asked myself - why do I want to go around these places anyway. Just for taking pictures? I mean is it worth all the trouble. They all look pretty much the same - and they all look pretty much like the pictures people share anyway.